there is simply no feeling that 'LIFE SHOULDN'T BE LIKE THIS!', or trying to lasso the clouds or sky or thought or feeling...
or capture this dream that sings itself as there is no feeling of separation from this magical aliveness
there is no worry at all, but there may be concern,
as all hope and fear of a never arising next is gone (and there is never boredom)
weeping heart wrenching sobs and feeling the utter beauty and awe... the gob-smacking magic of life looking and feeling like anything at all... that there are no things no selves, no next, no other,
.... no love...
and yet it all feels, somehow like love... like awe.... like
nothing at all….
such bittersweet beauty of life and death and love and
all that seems to sweep through this passion play
last breath of midnight dissolves the moon and her reflection
….and where is love when it is all love
This is Toni Packer—a chapter called “Yearning for Completion” in her book THE LIGHT OF DISCOVERY: When the sense of “me” is present with its deep feelings of insufficiency and incompleteness, with its endless searching for perfection and security, we can’t see freely. There is always that feeling of incompleteness as I think about myself. The thought of “me” is of necessity incomplete. Any thought is incomplete. There is no complete thought. Thought comes from fragmented memories that can never ever capture the aliveness of this moment. No matter how much I think about myself, what I am, how I am, what I should be—it’s never the whole live thing, because I am immeasurably more than the fragmented thoughts and pictures and feelings about myself. Thought and feeling cannot be complete. The completeness of life cannot be captured in thought or feeling. Thought is trying to do it all the time, but it can’t. We live in thoughts and feelings, alone and with others who are conditioned in the same way. From the thought-feeling of incompleteness arises wanting and fearing. Wanting completion and fearing the absence of it. Wanting fulfillment, meaning, and purpose. Wanting and fearing. In observing carefully, one finds that not a moment goes by without some wanting or fearing. Even if there is a moment of fulfillment, there comes the desire for more of it or the fear that this moment will end. One wants to keep it, wants to prolong it. All of it comes out of this feeling of incompleteness, which inevitably goes with the idea of “me” as a separate entity. And then there is the trying. Trying to become complete. Trying to become complete through thought: the spiritual paths, the exercises, the imposed practices, whether self-imposed or imposed by a discipline that one takes up, trying to become complete through time. It is all thought. Do we see that? Both the incompleteness we suffer from and the completeness we strive toward are thoughts and images. It is all an escape from what is actually happening right now, this very instant—simple all-encompassing presence without lack, unthinkable, vast, indivisible. --Toni Packer, from The Light of Discovery
This is from FB entry by Joan Tollefson...